Why is desire not enough? In this moment, as I feel my heart fold and twitch in panic, I wonder about this question. Why does desire not free my hands of rope? More importantly, why do I fear the rope so deeply? I know the answers, but these questions continue to arise.

I don’t want to be afraid of (institutional) authority. I want to trust that authority will not harm me, and also, above all, I want to trust that I am strong enough to dance my way through it all, antifragile and regenerative as the wind.