by Ang Kia Yee

It seems right that you are staging a disappearance now, in my hour of newness and estrangement and clarity. I bought you early in the aftermath of breaking up, when I was transitioning out of the ring I had worn while in the relationship. You were an intentional sign of devotion. I was trying to tell myself: I will love you now.

I was deeply comforted to have you, light blue beads in rows around my thumb. And it makes sense that, if your disappearance is in fact departure, that you are leaving now. I am another person now. It may be time for a new beaded ring (!) to accompany the next gesture of my life.

Wherever you may be, I wish you might return. I am no good at losing things, at being left behind. But if you are truly gone, I hope you are returning home to the world! You are, after all, of the world. Of course, the time we spent together was of the world, too. But you, of all things, would understand what I mean.